wait! they don't love you like I love you...

This one is for Hailey, who insisted on my keeping up my blog when I started slacking.

So my oldest sister printed off all my blogs and e-mails to her during my time in Bangladesh and put them all together in a book which she gave to me this weekend. I read parts of it this afternoon and it made me laugh and think and understand some things about myself that I wasn't aware of before. I came across one blog entry from November when I asked the question: "is it possible that someone's idea of who you are could be closer to the truth that what you have believed about yourself?"

This made me think. Think about my frame of mind when I wrote it, think about all that lead up to that point, think about all that has happened since then. It reminded me again that sometimes we need to listen to what others say about ourselves to remind us who we are, who we can be, who we must continue to be and what we need to get rid of. I came across an old Christmas card this weekend from a friend who had written to me about who I was in her eyes back then. I had forgotten some of those things, I had forgotten that I still have them inside me and I need to fight to bring them back out.

In one of my blogs in October, i included this excerpt from DH Lawrence's "Lady Chatterly's Lover":

"Our is essentially a tragic age, so we refuse to take it tragically. The cataciysm has happened, we are among the ruins, we start to build up new little habitats, to have new little hopes. It is rather hard work: there is now no smooth road into the future: but we go round, or scramble over the obstacles. We’ve got to live, no matter how many skies have fallen."