what am I supposed to do? there are too many of you...

I am sitting in the sun listening to the Be Good Tanyas. Their music haunts me, that whispery bluegrass accented by harmonicas and slide guitars. The song "Its not Happening" came up and as I listened to it, it reminded me of coming back home from work in Dhaka, sitting on the couch, eating pineapple and singing along to this song. Its frustrating to me that I sit here now, thousands of miles and three months away from that time and place and still I feel as though this song is knitted into my soul...maybe even more deeply than it was back then.

"The way your mind works
Travels so fast
Carving your way
Through the city

And you can tell me
You get what you want
You figure it out
And you're just fine

Cuz you're talking to yourself
Don't hear a thing
Now history unfolds before you
You just shut your eyes
You just shut your eyes
It's not happening

We all go up, down
Fend for ourselves,
Or fend for each other
Fend for each other sometimes

But you keep on racing me
Like something's chasing you
Like something's gonna get you
Something's gonna get you
One day

And you're talking to yourself
Don't hear a thing
Now history unfolds before you
You just shut your eyes
You just shut your eyes
It's not happening

And you're talking to yourself
Don't hear a thing
Now history unfolds before you
You just shut your eyes
You just shut your eyes
It's not happening

You just shut your eyes
You just shut your eyes
It's not happening
No, no, no, hmm...."

- Be Good Tanyas "Its not Happening"